Tuesday, December 25, 2012

merry christmas

from our family to yours with love, 
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Sunday, December 16, 2012

friday morning...

As I drove to work on Friday morning I thought about the plans for day, the activities my kindergarteners would do, and was thankful it was Friday. I noticed a lady who seemed to miss the turn on a back road and got herself stuck in a ditch. I was thankful a man stopped to help her and I thought to myself that I need to add the local police department's phone number to my phone. As I entered the building I began my morning routine; turning on computers, starting up the projector, sharpening pencils, saying my hellos. This Friday morning added a bit of excitement and joy because there were treats in the lounge. Fridays are always better when there are treats.

Little did I know that as I was preparing for my kindergartners to enter my classroom another school across the country was facing a horrific tragedy. Little did I know elementary teachers were facing their worse nightmare. Teachers were praying for their students and doing anything within their power and control to try and keep their students safe. Little did I know...

I learned about the events in Connecticut from a parent. She had e-mailed me to let me know how much she appreciated all I did for her son and all the students in my class. Unaware of what had unfolded I quickly checked our local news website and read in shock about the events. As I read I think I went numb. I did not let myself cry and truly process the events. As a teacher I had to keep some composure. I could not fall apart. I could not allow my students to see me shaken and not be able to explain why. I breathed. I prayed. And I began to think about what I would do if that happened to me, to my school, to my students. As my students walked out the door on Friday afternoon I gave them an extra squeeze and reminded them I loved them.

On Saturday morning Eric was watching coverage of the Connecticut tragedy. I was only standing in the room for a minute or so when they began to talk about the teachers who had lost their lives protecting their students. With tears in my eyes I had to walk out of the room. I could not stay. I could not listen. I could not watch. I have not read any more about the shootings. I have not watched any of the news coverage. I have seen bits and pieces of new details on social media. I have had a few conversations with others. I am heartbroken. Heartbroken.

As a teacher I have thought about those teachers. The fear they faced. The faces of their students looking at them. Wondering. Terrified. As a teacher this is the worst thing that could ever happen to your school and your students. We train for this. We have drills, discussions, and more drills. We play the scenario out in our minds. We stare at our classrooms and wonder where would my kids be the safest. And we pray the day will never, ever, come. For these teachers the day did come. These teachers and administrators did everything right, they did what they were trained to do, they told their students they loved them, they protected them. They gave up their life for their students.

I love my students. I would do anything to protect them. I have told them countless times that they are safe. I have told them that I would do anything to keep them safe, anything. Without a second thought I would protect my students to my death. Just as I would my daughter. They are my children. They may not be my flesh and blood but they are mine and I would do what ever it took to keep them safe.

As I walk into my classroom on Monday morning I will fight the tears. I will whisper my thank you's for being able to teach another day. I will keep Sandy Hook Elementary and it's community in the forefront of my thoughts and prayers. I will give hugs without reason and I will let me students know how much I love them.

Monday morning will not be easy. Monday morning will not be without tears. Monday morning will be tough. On Monday morning I will be greeted by 29 faces eager to learn, eager to play, eager to be a part of their school community. Monday morning will come...
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Sunday, October 14, 2012

without words

The events of the past week have left me without words. I am heartbroken, I am angry, I am confused, I am uneasy. I fight the tears as I drive to work, I become nervous when anything seems out of the norm, I am obsessive about locking my doors, I find sadness in the constant police presence in my community. I find the news, social media, and some conversations overwhelming. I want to turn back time and wish this never happened. I want my community to feel safe again.

This world is a fallen, broken, place. I cannot turn back time, I cannot change things out of my power and control. I can pray that justice is served. I can pray that the person who has turned this community upside down will be caught. In the end he will have to answer for his actions. May it be here on earth or in hell, he will be held responsible.

I stumbled across this video this morning. It is a beautiful reminder that God is always near.

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Tuesday, August 14, 2012

summer swimming lessons

Summertime means one thing for certain: swimming lessons.

This summer Kate participated in both of the summer swimming lesson sessions through our local parks and recreation department. Although she did not pass to the next level she has become far more comfortable in the water. She is now willing to get her whole head wet, can get herself in and out of the pool all on her own, wants to be first to try everything, and tolerates being splashed. We are so proud of all she has accomplished and her increased comfort level in the pool.

We are looking forward to more swim lessons and watching her gain all the skills needed to be a proficient swimmer!

(This was my first attempt at putting together a video using iMovie. I am pretty impressed at how well it turned out. Enjoy!)

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Sunday, August 12, 2012


Loving: My new Saltwater Sandals. I believe these will become a new summer-time staple in our house. They are comfortable, classic, and go with anything. 

Reading: I finished reading Two Kisses for Maddy by Matthew Logelin about a week ago. It is a beautiful, touching, memoir about a man who lost his wife 27 hours after she gave birth to their daughter, Maddy. It made me laugh, it made me cry, and it made truly think about what matters most in life. I have just started reading Bloom by Kelle Hampton this week. Bloom is another beautiful memoir about the birth of Kelle's second child, Nella. It is a story that pulls on my heartstrings and reminds me to find the everyday beauty in life. 

Watching: We have been watching the Olympics and a little pre-season football. 

Anticipating: The start of the school year. My classroom is done. The year is laid out. Now its time to plan the first days and meet my students.

Listening To:  A variety of music. I have had The Nadas, The Gaslight Anthem, and John Mayer blaring through my speakers lately. 

Planning: Still working on the start of the 2012 - 2013 school year. The ideas have moved from thoughts floating around in my head to paper. Now they to move from paper to a digital, easy-to-share, document. 

Working On: Making the most of the day. The noisy moments, the quiet moments, and the in-between moments. I am also working on finding a way to carve out time to write and edit photos. It is something I love but not something I make regular time for. 

Wishing: To make the most of the last two and half days of summer and a wonderful start to the school year. 

What are your currently loving, anticipating, wishing?

The inspiration and idea for this post came from the beautiful Danielle at Sometimes Sweet.

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